I'm trying to look at the bright side of recovering.
Last Wednesday, Jeff's mom was here, so she stayed at the house with Matt, and Jeff and I got to go to Ash Wednesday church. I love Lent church services.
Then I didn't change a single diaper for at least three days!
On Sunday, since I can't pick Matt up and I was safe from his grabby hands, I wore jewelry to church! Engagement ring with diamonds prone to scratching pudgy baby limbs, earrings, and necklace.
I've been getting tons of sleep, from maybe 7:30 or 8 p.m. until 5:30 or 6 a.m.
While she was still here, Jeff's mom and I had tons of time to chat about things and talk about how great Matthew and Jeff are.
All my friends are visiting! Well, mainly so they can do the literal heavy lifting, but nonetheless it's been nice to hang out with Krista and Stephenie and kids the past couple days.
Jeff did a ton of things around the house last night, and I just lounged around and read and drank tea!
MOMS Club people have been bringing us delicious suppers that will last at least until next week.
So it's not all bad. But, yeah, it will be nice when I don't feel vaguely ill and exhausted and can give Matthew a decent cuddle again.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Half done with the other worst part
So, surgery is over. And now it's horrible recovery time. I'm thankful for how well the surgery went and how well recovery is going so far, but emotionally, it's difficult. Matthew just wants some cuddles from his mother, but I can't pick him up! And I can't really hold him, either, since that always involves him jabbing me in the stomach with his arms or legs. Poor little guy doesn't understand. He probably thinks I'm just a mean mom now who doesn't want to cuddle with him.
But anyway, I made it through getting the IV, though I did cry a little, and both of my hands and arms went numb briefly (the anesthesiologist told me to hold my breath as long as possible and it would fix it, and it did), the surgery itself of course was all a blank, and somehow I managed to stop feeling sick long enough to get in the car and come home. Once home, Jeff and his mom have been taking care of Matt and everything in the house, and I've just been sitting around or laying in bed, and MOMS Club Madison South people have brought suppers by.
Yesterday I didn't feel too bad––or too good––and last night I managed to get some sleep. I probably have slept half the day today, and I haven't taken any painkillers since 6 a.m., so that's going well. I only want to take painkillers at night if possible. And so far it's possible.
The best thing is that the incision site is super-glued shut, so I can shower already and not have to worry about bandaging the wound or cleaning it or anything. Also, the scar is smallish and on my bellybutton, so once the swelling and bruising go down, it might not even look like I've had surgery there.
Matt's napping hasn't been going so great. He's been sleeping all night, but he's been taking the dreaded 45-minute naps, from which he wakes up crying because he's not really ready to be done sleeping. Hopefully he won't get too derailed from his new, excellent sleeping routine. He's at the park now with Jeff and Grandma Alexy, probably swinging, which is his favorite. I tried to go for a little walk earlier but only made it a couple houses down the street. It was nice to be outside, though.
I kept thinking all day how it feels like something's missing from my day, and then I realized it's diaper changes! I haven't changed a diaper since Wednesday! It's so weird. That's a nice break, but I do wish I could just wash laundry and dishes and do all my other usual household tasks since it's easier for me than for Jeff.
And they're back from the park! Yay! Time to hang out for a while and then figure out what we're going to do on Monday and the days afterward...
But anyway, I made it through getting the IV, though I did cry a little, and both of my hands and arms went numb briefly (the anesthesiologist told me to hold my breath as long as possible and it would fix it, and it did), the surgery itself of course was all a blank, and somehow I managed to stop feeling sick long enough to get in the car and come home. Once home, Jeff and his mom have been taking care of Matt and everything in the house, and I've just been sitting around or laying in bed, and MOMS Club Madison South people have brought suppers by.
Yesterday I didn't feel too bad––or too good––and last night I managed to get some sleep. I probably have slept half the day today, and I haven't taken any painkillers since 6 a.m., so that's going well. I only want to take painkillers at night if possible. And so far it's possible.
The best thing is that the incision site is super-glued shut, so I can shower already and not have to worry about bandaging the wound or cleaning it or anything. Also, the scar is smallish and on my bellybutton, so once the swelling and bruising go down, it might not even look like I've had surgery there.
Matt's napping hasn't been going so great. He's been sleeping all night, but he's been taking the dreaded 45-minute naps, from which he wakes up crying because he's not really ready to be done sleeping. Hopefully he won't get too derailed from his new, excellent sleeping routine. He's at the park now with Jeff and Grandma Alexy, probably swinging, which is his favorite. I tried to go for a little walk earlier but only made it a couple houses down the street. It was nice to be outside, though.
I kept thinking all day how it feels like something's missing from my day, and then I realized it's diaper changes! I haven't changed a diaper since Wednesday! It's so weird. That's a nice break, but I do wish I could just wash laundry and dishes and do all my other usual household tasks since it's easier for me than for Jeff.
And they're back from the park! Yay! Time to hang out for a while and then figure out what we're going to do on Monday and the days afterward...
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Half done with the worst part
Half done with the worst part of surgery! I made it through the blood drawing yesterday! No passing out, only a little crying, no need for help walking to the car. The other half of the worst part will be getting the IV. I mean, sure, recovery is going to suck, but at least it won't involve needles.
In other news, Matthew's sleeping is continuing to go well. He got a solid 10 hours last night and 3 good naps today. He didn't cry for even a minute when I put him in the crib for the night, though he's still awake right now. He talked to himself happily about 10 minutes and now he's been fussing lightly for about 2 minutes. I'm sure he'll be sleeping by the time I finish this.
More things about the surgery: How lame is it that I can barely make it through having blood drawn? Don't answer that. I already know the answer: Very. But seriously. It makes me mad. I think it's getting worse as I get older, too. I mean, it's not the pain. I've had a million injuries from bike wrecks and jumping off stuff and doing stupid stunts, I've run three marathons, I've played multiple seasons of rugby and roller derby, I intentionally ran into my friends while sledding during college for fun, I gave birth completely unmedicated... but I can't have blood drawn without my leg or arm twitching uncontrollably and my eyes tearing up even if I'm fighting it? How does that make sense?
Also, I still just think it's unfair that I have a hernia considering I have always been known for having abs of steel. Argh.
And, to make things worse, I won't be able aquacise until April! Can't submerge the wound until then.
But on another happy note! (I like to intersperse the unhappy with the happy.) It's almost the weekend! Tomorrow Matt and I are going to Breakfast Bunch with one of the moms' groups, which is fun, then we'll get to hang out with Jeff all weekend!
In other news, Matthew's sleeping is continuing to go well. He got a solid 10 hours last night and 3 good naps today. He didn't cry for even a minute when I put him in the crib for the night, though he's still awake right now. He talked to himself happily about 10 minutes and now he's been fussing lightly for about 2 minutes. I'm sure he'll be sleeping by the time I finish this.
More things about the surgery: How lame is it that I can barely make it through having blood drawn? Don't answer that. I already know the answer: Very. But seriously. It makes me mad. I think it's getting worse as I get older, too. I mean, it's not the pain. I've had a million injuries from bike wrecks and jumping off stuff and doing stupid stunts, I've run three marathons, I've played multiple seasons of rugby and roller derby, I intentionally ran into my friends while sledding during college for fun, I gave birth completely unmedicated... but I can't have blood drawn without my leg or arm twitching uncontrollably and my eyes tearing up even if I'm fighting it? How does that make sense?
Also, I still just think it's unfair that I have a hernia considering I have always been known for having abs of steel. Argh.
And, to make things worse, I won't be able aquacise until April! Can't submerge the wound until then.
But on another happy note! (I like to intersperse the unhappy with the happy.) It's almost the weekend! Tomorrow Matt and I are going to Breakfast Bunch with one of the moms' groups, which is fun, then we'll get to hang out with Jeff all weekend!
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Baby sleep chronicles, day 4
...and then last night, Tuesday, Matthew fell asleep within 7 minutes. I don't think Jeff even went in the room to comfort/reassure him. We heard a couple half-second sleep cries before we went to bed, then nothing all night long. I woke up at 2:45 a.m. and heard Matt moving around and making some little talking noises, but he just went right back to sleep! No crying at his usual 3 a.m. wakeup! Then he woke up at 5:40 a.m. and just jibber-jabbered to himself for a while before letting us know it was seriously time to get up.
The best thing that's happening here, other than Matthew sleeping longer and better, of course, is that now he wakes up happy most of the time. Sure, he's still crying a few minutes before falling asleep every time, but at least when he wakes up he's not crying. And his napping has improved dramatically. It's so much better for both of us for him to sleep longer during fewer naps. He gets enough rest and doesn't have to catnap every hour and a half, and I can actually get things done. It's amazing how much an extra half hour makes a difference. I'm hopeful we can stay on this 2-nap schedule instead of going back to 3+. We'll see. He's on nap #1 for today, and he fell asleep in half the time it's taken him for the past couple days' naps.
The best thing that's happening here, other than Matthew sleeping longer and better, of course, is that now he wakes up happy most of the time. Sure, he's still crying a few minutes before falling asleep every time, but at least when he wakes up he's not crying. And his napping has improved dramatically. It's so much better for both of us for him to sleep longer during fewer naps. He gets enough rest and doesn't have to catnap every hour and a half, and I can actually get things done. It's amazing how much an extra half hour makes a difference. I'm hopeful we can stay on this 2-nap schedule instead of going back to 3+. We'll see. He's on nap #1 for today, and he fell asleep in half the time it's taken him for the past couple days' naps.
Baby sleep chronicles, day 3
The epic nap on Monday lasted 2 hours and 45 minutes!
Monday night it took about 15 minutes for Matthew to fall asleep. He slept very peacefully except for the usual 3 a.m. wakeup, during which there was much crying (both of us. Probably Jeff secretly, too, for being tired of me waking him up to pray for us all every time Matt makes a peep in the night). But seriously, the crying. It breaks my heart. All I can do is think about how Matt's not hungry and he hasn't needed a single thing at 3 a.m. in weeks, probably months, and we have have have to help him get better sleep habits. So we made it through, and he woke up happy instead of crying.
Yesterday, only 2 naps! Woohoo! I'd love to stay on a 2-nap schedule. This 3- to 5-nap schedule is annoying, and Matthew seems to usually wake up crying because he's still tired. And each was about an hour and a half long. After the second one, Matt stayed awake a record 5 hours! He seemed sleepy for the last hour but wasn't too fussy. He demanded extra cuddles, which was nice. He's not really a cuddle baby. He's more of a "Let me down! I have places to go! I have to grab those things! And those things! And those other things!" kind of baby.
Monday night it took about 15 minutes for Matthew to fall asleep. He slept very peacefully except for the usual 3 a.m. wakeup, during which there was much crying (both of us. Probably Jeff secretly, too, for being tired of me waking him up to pray for us all every time Matt makes a peep in the night). But seriously, the crying. It breaks my heart. All I can do is think about how Matt's not hungry and he hasn't needed a single thing at 3 a.m. in weeks, probably months, and we have have have to help him get better sleep habits. So we made it through, and he woke up happy instead of crying.
Yesterday, only 2 naps! Woohoo! I'd love to stay on a 2-nap schedule. This 3- to 5-nap schedule is annoying, and Matthew seems to usually wake up crying because he's still tired. And each was about an hour and a half long. After the second one, Matt stayed awake a record 5 hours! He seemed sleepy for the last hour but wasn't too fussy. He demanded extra cuddles, which was nice. He's not really a cuddle baby. He's more of a "Let me down! I have places to go! I have to grab those things! And those things! And those other things!" kind of baby.
Monday, February 13, 2012
Baby sleep chronicles, day 2
So on Sunday, day 2 of baby sleep chronicles, Matthew took a nice, long nap with only 8 minutes of fussing beforehand. I think he slept an hour and forty minutes or so. His second nap on Sunday was also good, longer than usual, and he fell asleep after about 20 minutes of fussing. His third nap was okay but shorter than usual. All in all, success.
Sunday night we went through the routine, earlier than Saturday, at our ideal time of putting Matthew in the crib between 6 and 6:30. He fell asleep with less than 20 minutes of crying, with Jeff still checking on him and reassuring him, with me still hiding out in the bathroom with the fan on, talking on the phone. Matt fell asleep at 6:35, and he didn't get up for the day until 6:50 a.m. He had a slight crying jag somewhere around 3 again (the time I was previously trying to feed him, when he would only sometimes eat). I'm astounded. I'm just astounded.
Napping today has been good. Matt's on his second nap. The first one, I didn't think he should be tired yet, but he was, and he fell asleep after about 20 minutes of fussing. He only slept 35 minutes or so, though. The second nap... that's what he's doing now. He fussed about 8 minutes, cried about 2 minutes, talked to himself for a couple more minutes, then fell asleep. He's been sleeping for 2 hours and 5 minutes!
Yes––2 hours and 5 minutes!
Is my really-good-at-sleeping baby coming back? I hope so. I think if we stick to this routine, everything will be great. Even though it hurts me to hear Matt cry even a little bit, things are already so much better. I know we'll still have to get up in the night sometimes when he gets more teeth and whatnot, but I think we're on the right track now. Losing the pacifier immediately helped with daytime napping, and not rocking is helping even more. Two long naps are infinitely preferable to five short naps. And not getting up in the night makes the days so very much better.
Stay tuned for baby sleep chronicles, day 3, to see if tonight goes as well as last night. I have high hopes.
And... 2 hours and 10 minutes and counting!
Sunday night we went through the routine, earlier than Saturday, at our ideal time of putting Matthew in the crib between 6 and 6:30. He fell asleep with less than 20 minutes of crying, with Jeff still checking on him and reassuring him, with me still hiding out in the bathroom with the fan on, talking on the phone. Matt fell asleep at 6:35, and he didn't get up for the day until 6:50 a.m. He had a slight crying jag somewhere around 3 again (the time I was previously trying to feed him, when he would only sometimes eat). I'm astounded. I'm just astounded.
Napping today has been good. Matt's on his second nap. The first one, I didn't think he should be tired yet, but he was, and he fell asleep after about 20 minutes of fussing. He only slept 35 minutes or so, though. The second nap... that's what he's doing now. He fussed about 8 minutes, cried about 2 minutes, talked to himself for a couple more minutes, then fell asleep. He's been sleeping for 2 hours and 5 minutes!
Yes––2 hours and 5 minutes!
Is my really-good-at-sleeping baby coming back? I hope so. I think if we stick to this routine, everything will be great. Even though it hurts me to hear Matt cry even a little bit, things are already so much better. I know we'll still have to get up in the night sometimes when he gets more teeth and whatnot, but I think we're on the right track now. Losing the pacifier immediately helped with daytime napping, and not rocking is helping even more. Two long naps are infinitely preferable to five short naps. And not getting up in the night makes the days so very much better.
Stay tuned for baby sleep chronicles, day 3, to see if tonight goes as well as last night. I have high hopes.
And... 2 hours and 10 minutes and counting!
Baby sleep chronicles, day 1
On January 20, I wrote, "I'm not sure what the plan is right now, but we'll have to have one soon. And stick to it even if I think it's too difficult."
The plan we made, I did in fact think was too difficult. But we're sticking to it. And we're helping Matthew learn how to fall asleep and keep sleeping. It's working beautifully so far, though there is some crying.
Our needs: For me to not have to rock Matthew to sleep. For Matt to be able to fall back asleep in the night when he wakes up.
Our wants: Longer naps.
Our hopes: Matthew to not need to eat in the night.
The plan requires me to be removed from the falling-asleep association, since I've been doing 100% of the rocking for weeks or months. (I'm not sure. It's all a blur.)
Plan: Do bedtime routine. It goes like this: Jeff bathe Matthew or sponge him off and change him into disposable diaper and pajamas. I feed him. We put him in his sleep sack. We sit in his room and sing a hymn. (This was a struggle the first couple days. Jeff and I are both such awful singers when there's no accompanying music. Oh so awful. It really gave me the giggles. But we persevere, and now I can sing without tittering the whole time.) We maybe read a book. This seems to rile Matt a little since he likes to get books in his little grabby hands and chew on them or just turn the pages. We say prayers.
Then I smooch Matt's face and leave the room. Jeff holds him a couple more minutes then puts him in his crib. Jeff leaves the room. I get in the bathtub with the fan on and read a book or call people, so as not to hear the crying. Jeff goes in and reassures Matthew every whatever number of minutes, in increasing intervals.
On Saturday, Matthew cried a lot. My heart was broken. He fell asleep after 45 minutes, which really was pretty good. I've rocked him for longer than that while he was crying. I had to keep reminding myself of that. If he's going to cry, it may as well be while he's learning to fall asleep on his own and I'm in a bubble bath than while I'm holding him and feeling like I can't stand another minute of it. He slept until 3ish, I think, when he sleep-cried/fussed for about 10 minutes, then he slept until 5:10. He didn't seem like he was starving in the morning, either. He did eat when he woke up, but I think he would rather have kept sleeping. I probably went in and got him too early since I was in the firm grasp of engorgement discomfort.
So, anyway, then it was Sunday, which leads to baby sleep chronicles, day 2...
The plan we made, I did in fact think was too difficult. But we're sticking to it. And we're helping Matthew learn how to fall asleep and keep sleeping. It's working beautifully so far, though there is some crying.
Our needs: For me to not have to rock Matthew to sleep. For Matt to be able to fall back asleep in the night when he wakes up.
Our wants: Longer naps.
Our hopes: Matthew to not need to eat in the night.
The plan requires me to be removed from the falling-asleep association, since I've been doing 100% of the rocking for weeks or months. (I'm not sure. It's all a blur.)
Plan: Do bedtime routine. It goes like this: Jeff bathe Matthew or sponge him off and change him into disposable diaper and pajamas. I feed him. We put him in his sleep sack. We sit in his room and sing a hymn. (This was a struggle the first couple days. Jeff and I are both such awful singers when there's no accompanying music. Oh so awful. It really gave me the giggles. But we persevere, and now I can sing without tittering the whole time.) We maybe read a book. This seems to rile Matt a little since he likes to get books in his little grabby hands and chew on them or just turn the pages. We say prayers.
Then I smooch Matt's face and leave the room. Jeff holds him a couple more minutes then puts him in his crib. Jeff leaves the room. I get in the bathtub with the fan on and read a book or call people, so as not to hear the crying. Jeff goes in and reassures Matthew every whatever number of minutes, in increasing intervals.
On Saturday, Matthew cried a lot. My heart was broken. He fell asleep after 45 minutes, which really was pretty good. I've rocked him for longer than that while he was crying. I had to keep reminding myself of that. If he's going to cry, it may as well be while he's learning to fall asleep on his own and I'm in a bubble bath than while I'm holding him and feeling like I can't stand another minute of it. He slept until 3ish, I think, when he sleep-cried/fussed for about 10 minutes, then he slept until 5:10. He didn't seem like he was starving in the morning, either. He did eat when he woke up, but I think he would rather have kept sleeping. I probably went in and got him too early since I was in the firm grasp of engorgement discomfort.
So, anyway, then it was Sunday, which leads to baby sleep chronicles, day 2...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)