Monday, June 29, 2015

Smartypants Sammy

Sam, or Sammy as he likes to call himself, has decided he likes to real cry, shout, fake cry, and real cry some more before going to sleep half the time lately. Today after lunch I was going over the plan with him. The plan is, "Sam, when you're in your crib, you need to lie down, close your eyes, suck your thumb if you want, and just relax until naptime is done." I told him the plan then asked him to say it back. I said, "Okay, what are you going to do after I get you ready for nap?" Sam said enthusiastically, "Stand up. Cry, cry, cry, cry, cry!"

Friday, June 5, 2015

Sibling squabbles

It's begun. And it will never end. It's funny and SO not funny at the same time, Matt and Sam squabbling. Some examples:

Sam: "Matt! Matt! Matt!"
Matt: "Mom, I don't want Sam saying my name! Sam, stop saying 'Matt! Matt! Matt!'"
Sam: "Matt! Matt! Matt!"
Matt: "I don't want you saying my name anymore. Mom, I don't want Sam saying my name."


Sam: silence
Matt: "I don't want Sam looking at me. Tell him not to look at me anymore."
Sam: "Look. At. Me."
Matt: "Sam, stop saying what I'm saying."
Sam: "I'm. Saying."


We were at Costco yesterday, and Matt and Sam had to sit in the cart while I was getting my glasses adjusted. They were facing the TVs. Matt started pretending to choose TVs to put in his cart. So Sam started pretending to choose TVs to hand to Matt. Matt got really upset and tried to get Sam - and then get me to make Sam - stop handing him imaginary TVs.

Oh, Sam

The other day, I was sitting on the couch when Sam snuck up behind me and pulled on the waistband of my shorts and looked in. He shouted, "Poop?" Apparently he think since I do that to him, he needs to do it back. Once again - oh, the glamour.

His other new thing is narration. This is usually adorable, except if Matt is crying: "Matt cry! Matt cry! Matt cry!" Matt doesn't appreciate it.

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Talk, talk, talk

Matt and Sam are both talk, talk, talking nowadays. Thankfully, they sometimes talk to each other instead of me. Matt's been hilarious lately. Sam will repeat anything we ask him to say. He also tells some pretty funny jokes, of the toddler variety.

Scene: Jeff and I were hugging on a Saturday morning.
Matt: "Why are you guys hugging?"
Me: "Why not? We like to hug."
Matt, suspiciously: "Are you going to work, Dad? Are you?"


Scene: Me, crying hysterically for sleep-deprivation + kids bickering reasons
Matt: "What is your face doing right now? Why is your face doing that?"


Scene: Matt and I were casually chatting about family members.
Me: "You could be a grandpa someday, too, you know."
Matt: "No, I couldn't."
Me: "Yeah, if you have kids someday and they have kids, then you'll be a grandpa."
Matt: "No, I won't."
Me: "Well, you never know."
Matt: "I'm not going to be a dad; I'm going to be a construction worker."