Tall encounters 11/2/11

Checkout line at Walmart.
Girl behind me: How old is your baby?
Me: About 4 months.
Girl: Whoa, he's big.
Me: Yeah.
Girl: And you're 5'10".
Me: Yep. How'd you know?
Girl: I recognize my own kind.

Exercise motivation 11/1/11

So today I decided to do some sit-ups while laying on the floor next to Matt. After the first couple, he started smiling. After the next couple, he started giggling. By the time I got to about the tenth one, he was all-out laughing and squealing like it was the funniest thing he’s ever seen.

Now, as a 4.5-month-old, he finds a lot of things entertaining, but this, this was out-of-control hilarity. It was right up there with tickling his belly and making chirping noises at the same time.

I’m pretty motivated to do enough sit-ups that it’s no longer entertaining, but routine. It may be a funny sight now, but soon enough I’ll look less like I’m flailing around and more like I’m actually working out (though Matt may not be able to tell the difference).

10 reasons I quit a perfectly good roller derby team to help start a new one in the same city 10/31/11

People have asked me a bunch of times why I didn’t rejoin Dixie Derby Girls after having the baby and have instead joined a start-up team, Rolling Arsenal of Derby, in the same city. Here’s why (not in order):
1. Smaller team. RAD is capping the team at 20 players. One team, no plans for expansion. This is an environment in which I thrive. More playing time in scrimmages, easier to get to know how my teammates play, less room for personal slacking and excuses for not training harder.

2. Led by a single coach. When I played rugby in college, I found that the seasons we had a dedicated coach were better organized than the seasons some of the vets ran practices. Same thing here. I like organization.

3. Not many off-the-track obligations. There aren’t many fundraisers, so that really adds to my time hanging out at home and free time on weekends.

4. Not in it for the friends. My “real life” friends, aka people who have been to my house for completely social reasons, all play for DDG or have quit roller derby altogether. But, you know, real friends stay friends even when they don’t get to hit each other. My RAD teammates, who I consider friendly acquaintances that may become friends throughout time, I think are also more focused on just playing than playing to make friends. (I know. I’m unfriendly. Always have been.)

5. Challenge. I like a practice that makes me cry. RAD practices are so reminiscent of practices with Burn City when I first joined in Auburn. Just a team’s worth of girls pushing it hard and encouraging each other. If I miss a practice, I feel like I’ve missed so much. One time a couple years ago, I cried after practice out of frustration that we weren’t training harder. I don’t think that will happen again.

6. Off-skates workouts. Plyometrics and stairs and running and hiking, and a majority of the team showing up with enthusiasm. I’m such a fan of cross-training. Adds to the fun!

7. No derby names and no crazy outfits. This is something I think is good for derby overall, but it’s also something that has irked me since the first time I stepped on the rink. I like some garish, non-matching tights, socks, and accessories, but I kind of hate seeing people’s butt cheeks and full cleavage and thongs outside of short shorts. And derby names have also never been my thing.

8. So much cheaper! I’m saving about $400 on dues this year! (All the more to spend on t-shirts and gear!)

9. More convenient practice times. See #3 re: more time hanging out at home when the baby’s awake, and not practicing during supper time. Added bonus: less traffic on the way to practice.

10. More say in league happenings, but no meetings. Less bureaucracy in the nonprofit side of things. I can say, “Hey, let’s do this thing,” we vote on it immediately, and we either do it or don’t do it. Less discussion, more action. Anything that gets me out of meetings is a good thing.

So if you’re in Huntsville during the season, check me out skating with RAD (www.rollingarsenalofderby) or swing by a DDG game (www.dixiederbygirls.com).

Physical limitations––what? 10/29/11

Back in the day––eighth grade to be exact––I had this span of a couple months, maybe a year, when I couldn’t do exactly what I wanted to, physically, whenever I wanted to. It was weird. I had some type of knee problem, diagnosed as osteochondritis dissecans (how many times I said those words over and over in my head, trying to make sense of it). Eighth grade was my first year as a “serious” runner, in track instead of softball, and it infuriated me that I wasn’t supposed to run because of some knee pain and little detached cartilage pieces in my knees that could get worse if I didn’t rest.

I had already missed my chance for cross-country and track in seventh grade and cross-country again in eighth (the school I went to in the fall didn’t have it), so I was pretty determined to run track in the spring in eighth. I’d seen some of the high-schoolers run and was sure I was much faster.

So this all led me to waking up really early and sneaking out of the house to run. Which led to me sometimes barely being able to walk during the school day from the knee pain. But it seemed worth it somehow. I can’t remember the track season from eighth grade at all, really, but in ninth grade, I set some school records for the mile and two-mile. It was worth the bad track meets when the pain flared up and I fell during the race and couldn’t finish to persevere during the better days and get my name up on the record board in the school gym.

And then for a bunch of years I scoffed at people who can’t do things, or worse, won’t do things out of fear. How many friends I goaded into climbing Sugarloaf, this big rock near where I went to college, or into learning to rollerblade or jumping off high things or climbing trees.

But now it’s kind of backfired: I have this lingering joint pain from pregnancy, and every day, my mind is like, Gah, what’s your problem? Get out there! Do something! It’s not that bad. But the rational side is like, Hey, wait it out. You’ll be fine. Don’t rush it, and you’ll be back to normal even sooner. I constantly scoff at myself. And then try to show myself that kind of empathy that’s really disguised condescension I’ve always had for people who won’t push themselves to the limit.

So now I’m running half a mile when I’d rather run two, skating half a practice instead of the whole thing, jumping on the trampoline for a few minutes instead of a few hours. I guess it’s true that with age comes wisdom. Or the memory of not always being able to walk all day has motivated me to be patient. (Eh, patience. Overrated.)

Most fun things about Mr. Pudgeball as a baby, 10/28/11

So we have this baby (Mr. Pudgeball). And he’s super fun. This is how I would interpret a typical day from his perspective:

“Ooh, I’m awake! Look, my foot! Mmm…. sock. Yay! Mom is tickling me! There’s Dad!” Smile smile smile smile.

“Mom just sneezed. That’s hilarious!” Giggle giggle.

“Look, a baby in the mirror! He’s smiling! I’m smiling! Look at us smile at each other. We’re both getting our diapers changed. Hee hee hee!”

“Dad coughed! Man, that’s so funny. These people are just so funny I can’t stand it.”

“There’s a blanket on my face. The world has ceased to exist. The blanket’s off my face! There’s Mom! Ha ha ha! Great joke! There’s a blanket on my face. Where is everyone? Oh! Ha ha! There they are! There’s a blanket on my face. I better not move. Ha ha ha! Tricked again! There they are! This is so funny!”

“Oh, look! My foot! There it is again. I’m going to put it in my mouth. Fun times.”

“I can shake this toy! Woohoo! …ah, it got me in the face again… but look! I can shake it!”

“Hey, it’s a room full of quiet people with one guy asking questions. Ha ha ha! Bible study is hilarious!”

“Mom is drinking some water. It’s fascinating! I could watch that all day.”

“Dad’s beard is scratchy!” Giggle giggle giggle.

“I’m smiling at Mom. Mom’s smiling at me. I’m smiling at Mom. Mom’s smiling at me. We’ll smile at each other for hours!”

This is about how the days go around here, punctuated by napping, eating, and the occasional crying. I never would have guessed that sneezing could be so amusing.

BCR-style thank-you letter: Ten things I learned this weekend

Various members of the Burn City Rollers post "Ten things I learned this weekend" notes on Facebook following bouts. That's what this is all about.

10. While DDG is my team, everyone I skated with from Auburn is also, equally, my team.
9. I cannot be thankful enough to Cho Cold for having her crazy idea to start a roller derby team. And I certainly can't be thankful enough for all the memories of practices where I felt like dying because of the strenuousness of the workouts. They really got me through that horrible last semester.
8. BCR has more logo and color changes than any team I know. But it is a successful ploy to sell more merch (at least to me)!
7. Amyn is ridiculously skinny. Really. I can't get over how much less of her there is, but how much more menacing she is on the track.
6. When I was benchcoaching, this weird thing kept happening: I kept looking at the track, thinking, "Wow, that skater on the other team really looks like Cho." ... "Oh, yeah, that is Cho." Either I'm not observant or just super-focused on the bench.
5. Even though Venna Viper, Super Combo, BTE, Babe E. Quakes, and Lucy Ferocious aren't a part of BCR anymore, they still are in my head. Their absence was striking. (And everyone else who moved or left, but especially them.)
4. 9lb Hammer is, like, 20 times faster than she was a year ago!
3. I've always been one to leave an afterparty early, but it was still really sad to not go at all. I woke up at one in the morning, thinking, "I should be leg-wrestling at The End Zone right now."
2. Mary Helley's enthusiasm while saying this bout was the first time she'd been on a winning team almost made up for my disappointment at being on the losing team. But not quite. I'd really have liked to win.

1. 9 and Amyn walking toward me at the VBC with a basket full of baby things from BCR was a rather surreal experience, and so heartwarming. I'm not much given toward sentimentality, but that gift meant, unexpectedly, so much to me. It said, "Hey, you haven't been in Auburn for nearly two years, and you're not skating anymore, but we thought about you. And took action." I don't take that kind of considerateness for granted. Thank you so much, all of you, for that, and for creating my love of derby.

Derby dream montage

This weekend, my old roller derby team, the Burn City Rollers, will play my new roller derby team, the Dixie Derby Girls for our first home game of the season. I'm super excited (though not as excited as I would be if I could actually hit some of my old teammates! Out of affection, of course, not malice).

The fact of this upcoming game combined with the awesomeness that was last night's practice, along with my unfortunate lack of deep sleep caused by this baby referee kicking around in my abdomen, gave me a full night's worth of roller derby montage dreams. It was just like being at the movies but way cooler.

Disgrace Kelley telling me when she's jammed in scrimmage, she knows she'll get through the pack when she sees DISPATCHher on the track. DISPATCHher saying she tries to look out for her girls.

9lb Hammer wearing the most adorable tutus ever. And hitting girls hard. But still adorably.

The first hard hit I ever took, Lucy Ferocious putting me on the ground when I wasn't looking. Getting up and laughing as I took off after her.

The BCR inaugural meeting at some bar in Auburn, with Dixie Thrash saying she can tell right off which girls aren't going to stick with it while looking me in the eye. Me asking her later what it is she thought she saw in me that said "quitter."

BOA and eRacer X gleefully exclaiming something at each other, maybe that they finally were on the same scrimmage team. Unimportant words in the midst of unadulterated enthusiasm.

Seeing an unfamiliar girl wearing sparkly booty shorts––taller than me––warming up. And realizing it's Snidely.

Being consoled by Amyn Atcha in the most disgusting bathroom on earth (Skate Center, Auburn) about something long irrelevant, probably related to grad school or the torture that was wedding planning.

Seeing the hustle that has suddenly energized Sawblade Sindy and given her a sense of purpose on the track.

Taking down Dixie Thrash at last year's scrimmage.

Reliving every hilarious moment of Cho Cold's antics at Anna Malinstinct's unforgettable and ridiculous sleepover.

Crying in my car after practice and the intense embarrassment of having C.U. Afterclass ask me what was wrong, my answer being, "People are such complainers. Why can't practice be harder? I hardly ever feel like I'm going to die by the end of it."

Taking the hardest hit of my life (including rugby) from Cakeface Killa at the Spread the Love scrimmage and having a bruised sternum and rib for weeks. But liking it a lot.

Getting to be on the bottom of the derby girl pyramid at The End Zone.

Watching the apparent effortlessness Ebbin Flow and Pinky Tuscadero put into the game.

Remembering how difficult it was to make room for derby in my last-year-of-grad-school schedule, but how very rewarding.

I've never thought of either of my teams as "my derby family" as so many girls do, but as something different and somehow better. C.S. Lewis summed it up, “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one.'”