Every year when the Iron Bowl rolls around, I think about this conversation I had before moving to Alabama. I was working at a gift shop right outside Yellowstone National Park (for commission, hence my chattiness), and I was excited about going to Auburn for grad school. My baseline knowledge of the South and college football in general included… nothing. My family may be a sports-watching family, but they’re much more into pro sports. So…
This family with heavy Southern accents came into the gift shop, I greeted them, said, “Let me guess where you’re from. Alabama?”
They were surprised that I guessed correctly (as was I - could have been any other Southern state for all I know of accents).
Me: I’m moving to Alabama in a month!
Family: Really? Where? Why?
Me: I’m going to grad school at Auburn.
Family: What? Ughhh, no. (groans all around)
Me: What? I’ve heard it’s a really good school. They have a great technical writing program.
Family: Ugh, you should go to Alabama.
Me: (unaware of existence of University of Alabama) Umm, yeah. I am. I’m going to Auburn.
Family: No, you should go to Alabama.
Me: Huh?
Family: University of Alabama.
Me: Oh, well, it’s too late. I’m already going to Auburn.
Family: I don’t know if we can buy anything at this gift shop.
Me: What? (getting very worried about my educational choices at this point. They must know something I don’t about Auburn since they so very strongly want me to not go there.) Is Auburn bad?
Family: (must have sensed my distress) No, it will probably be fine. But cheer for Alabama! (much enthusiasm accompanying this) You’ve got to cheer for Alabama!
Me: Okay. For what? Do people usually cheer for colleges?
Family: (looking at me like I’m an insignificant creepy bug) College football. Of course.
Me: Oh. Okay. That makes sense. (It didn’t.)
It didn’t really make sense at all until my first football weekend in Auburn, when I woke up to what I thought was the voice of God coming from the sky and looked outside to see thousands and thousands of people swarming the streets with as much food as they could lug and drinking beer in the morning. Turns out it wasn’t armageddon; football really is a big deal.
How strange that the whole concept has ceased to be strange.
This family with heavy Southern accents came into the gift shop, I greeted them, said, “Let me guess where you’re from. Alabama?”
They were surprised that I guessed correctly (as was I - could have been any other Southern state for all I know of accents).
Me: I’m moving to Alabama in a month!
Family: Really? Where? Why?
Me: I’m going to grad school at Auburn.
Family: What? Ughhh, no. (groans all around)
Me: What? I’ve heard it’s a really good school. They have a great technical writing program.
Family: Ugh, you should go to Alabama.
Me: (unaware of existence of University of Alabama) Umm, yeah. I am. I’m going to Auburn.
Family: No, you should go to Alabama.
Me: Huh?
Family: University of Alabama.
Me: Oh, well, it’s too late. I’m already going to Auburn.
Family: I don’t know if we can buy anything at this gift shop.
Me: What? (getting very worried about my educational choices at this point. They must know something I don’t about Auburn since they so very strongly want me to not go there.) Is Auburn bad?
Family: (must have sensed my distress) No, it will probably be fine. But cheer for Alabama! (much enthusiasm accompanying this) You’ve got to cheer for Alabama!
Me: Okay. For what? Do people usually cheer for colleges?
Family: (looking at me like I’m an insignificant creepy bug) College football. Of course.
Me: Oh. Okay. That makes sense. (It didn’t.)
It didn’t really make sense at all until my first football weekend in Auburn, when I woke up to what I thought was the voice of God coming from the sky and looked outside to see thousands and thousands of people swarming the streets with as much food as they could lug and drinking beer in the morning. Turns out it wasn’t armageddon; football really is a big deal.
How strange that the whole concept has ceased to be strange.
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